Clemson Friend's beleaguered email after his alma mater lost to Auburn on a missed field goal at the end of the game (2nd attempted field goal; the tying kick was nullified due to penalty):
"40 yard line, first row tickets for the Auburn game = terrible decision. They have a huge crown on their field which meant that we had zero visibility. You couldn't see anything in the bottom five rows. Biggest waste of money in my life."
My sympathetic response:
"So you spent a lot of money to travel to a crappy school that your crappy school is based off of only to have your heart ripped out at the end of the game in the most painful way possible? And you couldn't even watch? Then you got to drive 6 hours back?
That.Is.AWESOME!
'Auburn' should be a new multi-purpose cuss word for you.
'I got pulled for an auburnin' DUI. If that weren't bad enough, while I was waiting for bail a big black guy auburned me right in my auburn. Now I have herpes. Auburn.'
