Thursday, June 28, 2012

Unending Life Mandate Upheld

The United States Supreme Court upholds the controversial "Unending Life Mandate" on the principle that anyone who violated it and died in contravention was subject to fines under the taxing power and not the Commerce Clause. The decision is hailed as finally ending the needless scourge of mortality that, supporters argued, was affecting far larger numbers of poor than the rich. "Now that extra layers of poorly qualified bureaucrats are involved, Americans, black or white, 1% or 99%, are no longer forced to die when they just want to live forever, which is a basic human right, like being tall and good looking, and, most basic of all, only having good things happen," proclaimed the President. No word was given on funding as bureaucratic oversight of the mandate is set to exceed the global GDP.

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