Dictator's Guide to Holding Power: Part 5

As the events in the Muslim world of late have shown, despite thousands of years of evidence on what works to acquire and maintain a stranglehold on a populace, modern (im)potentates have clearly been out of the loop. Thus, for their benefit and that of their subjugated masses, I present

The Dictator's Guide to Holding Power (Part 5: Running Them in Circles)

So, we talked about how you need to keep the elite hunkered down and scared through your penchant for unpredictable violence.  The great unwashed are not paying much attention because they have food and something shiny to distract them.  All is well and you're finished!

Except...

Nope, it's just not that easy.  (If it were, this guide wouldn't be necessary, now would it?)  With the populace it is, but the elite can't just be scared of you.  Notice I say "just".  They should be, but that's not all.  They also should want to try to curry your favor.  Basically, dealing with them is like trying to get a stubborn mule going where you want it to go.  You can't just beat it; you have to dangle a carrot as well.  Just like raising a child (and you must view all your countrymen as malleable children), you must strike a balance between punishment and reward.  Ulimately, just like children, they will grow to seek your approval and yet resent you at the same time. Ah...filial love.  

You're not getting his attention; 

you're justifying his decision to emotionally abandon you.

At any rate, how do you accomplish this?  Well, you could simply bribe them, but then you'd seem weak at best, feckless at worst.  First of all, to do so would pierce the illusion of the puppet government; second of all, the general public actually much prefers when things go badly for the elite.  Schadenfreude might be a recent German word, but the sentiment is as old as time.

This is fantastic.  It's okay. You can admit. 

What to do then?  Well, you need to focus the energies of those who would otherwise be conniving to take your spot.  You need a civil service that appears to be a meritocracy of sorts.  You appear to be placating them by having them participate, but all you're really doing is sewing the seeds of discord by having them contend amongst themselves for pretty baubles.  With their focus on one-upping each other and acquiring non-existent power, you can rest assured they are not only not conspiring against you but undercutting each other, trying to intricate rivals in supposed sinister plots so you'll remove them from the equation and open a path to glory (or so they think).

Even though only about 50 people read this...

Please don't sue me, LucasFilm!

In the Soviet Union, the Politboro were the lackeys of Stalin and even had non-voting members, but you bet your sweet, dictator tookus that the upper ranks were doing everything they could to be part of it, just like you can bet the politburo members were doing everything they could to make sure they wouldn't be replaced.  Best of all, when one stabbed the other in the back, the little people secretly smiled; not as much as Stalin though.  That's the key.

I killed 20 million of my own people AFTER World War II...beat dat!

*********Update*********

I was informed I'm not supposed to go through a post without a hot chick, let alone two whole posts.

So.

Up Next: The finale!